My New Year’s Resolutions
Itâs that time of the year again. Time to make a new list of resolutions you will or will not keep.
âIâm going to the gym more.â âI want to spend less this year.â âI promise to read two books a month.â
You know what I want this upcoming year? I want to win. WellâŚmy teams to win.
Do I cheer for âpopularâ teams? Yes. Do I live and die with the teams of the 90s? Primarily. And yes, Iâve heard every annoying and obnoxious comment about my fanhood from my friends. No, literally, every single friend has taken their shot at some point.
Guess what? Iâm 24 years old. The last time any of these teams celebrated a championship was 1998. I was 12. I wasnât even Bar Mitzvahâd yet. Needless to say, manhood has been tough.
So here are my 2010 New Yearâs Resolutions:
Dallas Cowboys â win a playoff game.
Just one. The following is true: the first suggested Google search after entering âlast cowâ wasâŚyou guessed itâŚâlast cowboys playoff win.â The answer is December 28th, 1996. Tony Romo was in high school. I wasnât.
Dallas, youâve had a number of chances to win. Many of blessed memory. In 2003, I spent my night on a Caribbean cruise locked up in my room to watch you lose to the Carolina Panthers. There was the bobbled hold in 2006 against the Seattle Seahawks. I found myself, coincidentally enough, laying in the same position as my beloved quarterback â laying motionless on the ground, head in my hands, helpless. And there was 2007. 13-3. No. 1 seed in the NFC. A blown 4th quarter lead against the New York Giants and Patrick Craytonâs sure first down and possible touchdown drop. Accepting defeat isn’t any easier.
But this could be the year. There have been ups and downs. There was also a victory over the previously undefeated New Orleans Saints! You are oozing of confidence and swagger. And youâre probably going to have another shot at winning the division against the Philadelphia Eagles. Donât blow it this time.
Chicago Bulls â bring respectability to the arena Michael Jordan built.
Letâs be honest, Bulls. This is embarrassing. Blowing 35-point leads? Losing to the New York Knicks? Iâd rather watch the 1998 Chicago Bulls suit up and play â today. Where are Jud Buechler and Dickey Simpkins when you need them? Derrick Rose said it best when he told reporters the team plays with a ânonchalant attitude.â Whoâs to blame? John Paxson? Vinny Del Negro? Derrick Rose?
I donât really care anymore. I do know I no longer have the patience to find out. Many people believed this team would build off last seasonâs epic playoff series against the Boston Celtics. Instead we are seeing a redux of the Bullsâ post-Miami Heat playoff sweep season.
Sure, the Bulls may finish with 40 wins and sneak into the 8th spot. All I ask is you stop making excuses. Start playing hard. There is no way Chris Bosh, Dwyane Wade or even Carlos Boozer walk through that door if this continues.
In the time I spent writing this, I am still waiting for John Salmons to pass the ball.
Chicago Cubs â do I really have to say it?
Thereâs a reason I saved you for last, Cubbies. You are, by far, the most disappointing team Iâve ever had to watch. Fortunately, Iâm too young to understand the âlovable losersâ tag. Thank God. Because it was and is unacceptable.
Everyone knows the numbers. 101 years since your last World Series victory. 55 years since your last World Series appearance. Three years, $30 million for Milton Bradley.
Everything changed in 2003. You were the best team in baseball. Clearly, that wasnât enough. Prior to this season, you made the playoffs two consecutive years for the first time since the âaughts – of 1900. But in those two series, you won as many games as I did. Harsh, but true.
I believe in Lou. I believe in Aramis Ramirez and Derrek Lee and Alfonso Soriano (at least I want to). I still believe in Carlos Zambrano. Much like the Cowboys, and much unlike the Bulls, this team has the talent to make a deep playoff run. The question is whether they have the intestinal fortitude.
We know âit can happen,â but âwillâ it happen? Because I canât take it anymore. I want a World Series. There, I said it.
So there you have it. My 2010 New Yearâs Resolutions. That felt good to say. If only I could make a differenceâŚ
You know what? I can.
And Iâll start by running on the treadmill while reading the book I just bought at the half price store.